I Fell for a Friday Night Frankie
by Faye Raye
Summary: A little ditty about one girl's unsuccessful search for love at her local thetre, lighter than some of my usual stuff. btw a Routemaster is a type of bus in Britain. Please R and R ,hope you find it amusingg


I fell for a Friday night Frankie  
Should've known it was doomed from the start  
Should've known he'd used his stilettos   
To trample all over my heart  
  
I met him one night at the pictures  
At a late night Rocky Horror Show  
It wasn't like I was a virgin  
In fact I would regularly go  
  
I knew all the fans round here local  
The Magentas, the Riff-Raffs and Brads  
And the dirty old bloke in the back row  
Who I think works with my dad  
  
Then, 'cross the foyer I spied him  
Adjusting the strap on his heel  
The way he looked in suspenders   
I can't say how it made me feel  
  
He looked like a sex god in leather  
All lovely strong thighs and snake hips  
He had curly hair just like Curry  
And scarlet red gloss on his lips  
  
He was the most gorgeous transvestite  
I ever would probably see  
But I doubted he'd show an interest  
In poor little time warping me  
  
I'm not what you'd call very pretty  
I'm certainly no Little Nell  
I'm rather to fat for my corset  
And I've got chronic acne as well  
  
But our eyes met and he smiled at me warmly  
I swear my heart skipped a beat  
And when he crossed over to greet me  
I practically fell at his feet  
  
He took my hand and gallantly kissed it  
And growled to me ' How do you do?'  
But I was just too flustered to answer   
And say ' Better for seeing you!'  
  
He sat next to me in the old theatre  
As Pat Quinn's lips filled the screen  
He was sexy and camp and romantic   
All in all a Frankie fans dream  
  
I stared at him during ' Dammit, Janet,'  
Forgot my torch when Fritz sang ' There's a light,'  
I really thought I found my true love   
On that wonderful cross-dressing night  
  
I sheltered under his newspaper   
I let him chuck my hot dogs and rice  
He told me I had legs like Columbia   
And the body of Janet Weiss  
  
Oh and when we danced the Time Warp together  
My body and heart filled with lust  
It was all I could do not to grab him  
When he showed how he could pelvic thrust  
  
But don't get me wrong 'bout MY Frankie  
Sexual urges towards me he hid  
He didn't lay a finger or anything on me  
Though I wouldn't have complained if he did  
  
He just held my hand during the Floor show  
And no further than that did we roam  
I never knew a man quite as sensitive  
He cried when Tim sang ' Going Home,'  
  
I even wondered, at one point, did he like me?  
And silently begun to prey  
' Oh please lord, don't let him be attached,  
And even more don't let him be gay!'  
  
But as we walked home from the movie,  
I was captured by first love's naïve thrill  
He wrapped me up tight in his jacket  
To keep out the night's biting chill  
  
The evening was oh so romantic  
Just me and the starlight and him  
And a drunk bird outside the theatre  
Singing ' Splash, splash, do the swim!'  
  
  
  
It was then , in the lamplight, he kissed me  
It was perfect, how could it be less?  
I don't think he even minded  
That I made his lippie a mess  
  
He gave me his email and said 'call me'  
I knew to do that I wouldn't fail  
Even his address sounded romantic  
GentlemanFrank@hotmail  
  
I danced home that night in a daydream  
And mailed him first thing next day  
His to reply my message was instant  
And it carried on for a week that same way  
  
Each evening I'd go to my Inbox  
And be on the net for just hours  
He sent me a Rocky love sonnet  
And a bouquet of virtual flowers  
  
I thought to myself ' I have found him!  
My Transylvanian prince come at last   
He is my true love and I know it  
And plus he has a nice arse!'  
  
I dreamed we could run off together  
To a gothic castle built for two  
I dreamed of our black satin bedroom  
And all the naughty things we could do  
  
And then the following Friday  
He mailed me and asked ' Can we meet?  
I'll be waiting for you tomorrow, 10:30  
Outside Pizza Hut in the High Street  
  
I replied, said I would in a hurry  
I laid awake all of that night  
Couldn't wait to see my cross-dressing dreamboat  
Once again, this time in daylight  
  
Oh, the tricks the heart plays on the lovesick  
And sometimes it is so unkind  
But with the starlight, stockings and leather  
To all flaws in him I was blind  
  
  
So I got up next morning, dead early  
To pick out the outfit I'd wear  
I dressed up in black lace and leather  
Spent the morning back combing my hair  
  
I waited for him in the High Street  
The shoppers did think it queer  
To see me grinning like a nutter  
All dressed in my best Gothic gear   
  
Then off of the 302 Routemaster   
He stepped, I just had to blink  
He smiled and waved at me cheerily  
It was him, well at least I think  
  
He was a great deal shorter without heels  
And slightly more broad round the beam  
Make-up can make a jaw look stronger  
Or at least that's the way it would seem  
  
Mascara can make eyes less squinty  
A corset, a belly look tight  
Was this the beautiful Frankie  
Who I snogged last Saturday night?  
  
' Hi' he said as I nervously hugged him  
Outside Pizza Hut's glass panelled door  
It's funny how I hadn't noticed  
He spoke with a slight lisp before  
  
But was I judging him harshly  
You can't tell a book by it's cover  
Give him a chance for all I know  
He might be one hell over a lover   
  
He ushered me into the restaurant   
Picked out a booth near the back  
He said ' I got a coupon off Pepsi'  
And rummaged within his knapsack  
  
So there we sat eating our pizza  
Tomato sauce dripped down his chin  
As he talked about his rare Rocky collection  
And the time he met Pat Quinn  
  
' I'm into all Sci-fi,' he told me  
' Especially the old fashioned kind,'   
As he talked about Jules Vern and the Martians  
I slowly went out of my mind  
  
' I got into Rocky by surfing  
Most my time is spent on the net  
Turned out there was a convention  
Directly after Star Trek's.'  
  
So that's how he got into Rocky  
And why he thought he would come  
To the midnight showing last Friday  
In a costume made by his mum   
  
' I'm so glad I did,' he murmured  
As I longingly looked to the door  
' Because I'd never have met you  
I hadn't kissed a real girl before!'  
  
He said that dressed up like Frankie  
Gave him the courage to say  
What he wanted to me as the character  
And couldn't another way  
  
It's silly I know but I thought maybe  
Inside this strange little geek  
I could once again find the trannie  
That made all my sinews go weak  
  
And so out of hope and some pity  
I went with him back to his flat  
Where he showed me his poster collection  
And the cage where he kept his pet rat  
  
He sat me on the beer stained sofa  
And snuggled up close by my side  
He told me he had something to show me  
With an air of what vaguely was pride  
  
I hoped for some romance or passion  
Maybe there was hope for him yet  
But he reached down the side of the sofa  
And pull out a video cassette  
  
He popped it inside the recorder   
And said to me ' This should be good,'  
' I bought this tape off ebay  
The Complete Works of Director Ed Wood!'  
  
I left him there with his movie  
He told me that he didn't mind  
The fact was I just couldn't stand him  
I really wasn't being unkind  
  
I caught the bus home broken hearted  
But a little more wiser that day  
And sat down and wrote this poem  
'Cause I felt I had something to say  
  
If you are like me and love Frankie  
And fallen for his cross-dressing charms  
Remember his a fantasy figure  
You'll never end up in his arms  
  
Even, the darling Tim Curry  
Now tends to look rather drab  
Just an aging Hollywood actor  
Now that he no longer does drag  
  
Don't fall for a Friday night Frankie  
Take heed from my rhyme and my words  
You're in for a great disappointment  
Unless you are looking for nerds 


End file.
